More than a week after the ureteroscopic stone removal procedure and I am still not feeling well. I keep getting fevers at night, which normally drop down and out by morning time. Then, I begin to feel better throughout the day. When the sun sets, however, I start feeling my temperature rise, the cold chills hit me, and no amount of sweaters/sweats/blankets/tea make me feel better. It doesn't help to feel so dehydrated. I keep drinking as much water as I should, and nothing helps me feel better.

Now the baby is fighting her nap. I gotta go.

Don't make me go in there...

Remember those words? Part warning, part threat. Yeah, well...it also applies to kidney stones. Some kidney stones just don't want to come out. I managed to pass one, another was partially broken but would not come out...and that left me with a lot of back pain and a new doctor I became intimately acquainted with as we shared fatherhood stories and suggestions for kid-friendly restaurants in the Valley.

Now, I pretty much tried everything. I pleaded. I begged. I bribed. None of it worked. The last fragment would not go quietly down the ureter. The extracorporeal shock wave lithotripsy didn't work either. That's pretty much a procedure where you are asleep and your kidneys are pounded with shock waves to break up the stones. So after several ultrasounds, four months of pain, one extracoroporeal shock wave lithostipsy, and (finally) one ureteroscopic stone removal treatment - yup, we had to go in to get them out - I am free at last of the little tyrant that would not leave. 

If only it had been as easy as when Joey has kidney stones. Done in 30 minutes, less when you take commercial time into consideration. I swear, Hollywood has the easiest endings...

More than ever...

It's that time of the year when people are looking for a change. It could be something small, like wearing a different color or jeans to the office instead of slacks. It could be something large, like selling everything you have and moving across the country to someplace you picked out by throwing a dart at a map.

I have no desire to sell everything and move to the other side of the country right now. Nor do I want to change my wardrobe to the office - I am already a jeans and dress shirt kind of guy. The change that I am looking for falls somewhere in the middle. It is both within my control as well as out of my hands...

Good times indeed...good times indeed. :)

A note on Valentine's Day...

Fatherhood...

It has been almost a year since I last posted on this blog. So much has changed; so much has remained the same. Jaime and I now have a daughter. We named her Ix Chel Paz - Paz in memory of my mother.

I always heard people say how having a baby changes everything...that life is never the same. I say, GOOD. It should not be the same. Life should change and bring new experiences, new challenges, new rewards, new tribulations to overcome, new joys to fill your heart, mind and soul.

I would be lying, however, if I did not disclose this little piece. I am afraid of some changes. I try not to think about them, for they would shatter my entire foundation and being if even one of them ever materialized. So I look at my growing family instead and push thoughts of mortality away. I choose to look at them and fantasize of amazing futures and endless, wondrous, amazing possibilities. I work harder today to lay the foundation for those dreams and aspirations.

I do not typically celebrate Valentine's Day. Instead, I cup that love as best I can and take it with me everywhere I can...it is the light that shines my way in the darkest of moments, and pushes me to greater heights.

Perhaps a lot has changed, and I am glad it has. What hasn't changed is just how much more I love my family with every passing breath. I guess this is the only thing I want and hope never to change.